A Trip to Weber Physiotherapy

Physiotherapy was the only fix after years of over exertion of my hips joints. The hip, knee, and joint specialist told me on one of my regular trips to see him. It was no surprise to me that the sports I played that were the cause of the pain. In fact, I suspected it all along. The trips to the physiotherapist would have to begin two years after my senior year of basketball to start to rehabilitate my body to normal motion. My muscles had been overworked for years and now that they were able to relax because I had stopped playing sports, they shortened and knotted, putting lots of stress on my joints, particularly the hip joints. A diagnosis of physio was a good thing; it meant the joints were still intact and all they needed was a little bit of stretching to feel better again. Physio was no new thing for me, in fact I had been to several physio sessions for other injuries, but no physiotherapy session had been quite like this…

I had never heard of Weber Physio Therapy (link to website) before my specialist directed me there after my appointment and, man, was I in for a surprise when I got there. All of the other physio places I had been to previously were small, laid back, and almost comfortable, but when I pulled up to this place I was shocked because it was big! I had no idea where I was supposed to go and could not remember the name of the therapist I was supposed to see for the life of me. Good thing I was twenty minutes early! Thankfully though there was a nice lady at the front desk downstairs who was able to help me out and direct me upstairs to see M (ah yes that was his name, how did I manage to forget that?). After a long trek up the stair case that seemed to take forever to climb (And ironically hurt my hips even more) I was able to check in at the proper place and sit down in the waiting room as I was still about ten minutes early for my appointment. It was a relief when my name finally got called as the waiting room chairs weren’t the most comfortable things ever. I guess that’s because people usually do not show up so early for their appointments, or maybe they were just trying to show me how much I really did need this therapy, by making me suffer more before the appointment began.

The lady who called my name led me back into a small room with only curtains as walls and gave me a pair of small shorts (I’m not kidding, these were so small if you bend over too far you might moon your therapist!) to put on so that M could properly assess my hips. As this was my first appointment before they could start with any treatment, M would have to come and meet me and decide exactly what areas to focus on. No one told me this was going to be such a personal experience but maybe that was to be expected as it was the muscles in my hips, butt, and lower back that were the problem. I do not know how anyone else feels but I for one do not like to be touched, especially by strangers, so when M came in (the most attractive and young male therapist I have ever met, he actually told me he was a male model and a body builder!) and started poking and prodding me I was very uncomfortable. Thankfully this only lasted a few minutes as he was only pre-assessing (Good thing because I couldn’t handle having his elbows jabbing me in the butt anymore!). After he had decided that the best route was to tackle the hip joints first he called his assistant back in to hook me up to the first machine, the Inferential Current Machine (IFC).

When the assistant came in with IFC she explained to me that this is what they will use before every appointment starts. This machine sends electrical currents into the muscle and helps it relax. It has four electrodes that are placed on the skin above the problem area; for me this was the hips. When it was turned on, it felt as though my hips were falling asleep, just like the feeling you get when your foot falls asleep. It is a very weird feeling but also very relaxing, something you would not normally expect to be feeling at physio. Each electrode is covered in a nasty gel that leaves your skin feeling wet and sticky after they have been removed. Another thing that goes along with this treatment are hot towels. These are placed over the electrodes to help stimulate your muscles even more. The combination of the humidity and gel left me feeling wet and gross after they were removed, but my muscles felt better than ever!

After about twenty minutes, the IFC was removed and the Inferential Electrotherapy machine was put in its place. This machine was the weirdest thing I have ever seen. It consisted of four big suction cups that had a sponge inside them. When this machine was on, it felt like I was getting poked in the muscles with a million little needles. It hurt! Thankfully though, this machine was only on me for about ten minutes.

After this machine was removed M came back in to “have some fun” (Well, that’s what he called it anyways. to me it was more like torture time). It was time to get up close and personal with my physiotherapist, quite literally. I did not know that some physiotherapists went to such extremes to help their patients. It was the first time he was seeing me so I assumed he would give me some simple basic stretches to do at home and then send me on my way just like my previous therapists had done, but this was not the case. He poked, prodded, and stretched every muscle in my legs, lower back, and butt that he could. He spared no expense. He jabbed either his fingers, knuckles, or elbows into every muscle, oddly enough focussing on the muscles in my butt (talk about awkward right?). His fingers jabbed into me so hard you could feel that he was putting all the weight of his perfectly toned body behind them. He came at me from every angle. He had me flipping from front to back and side to side so he could be sure he covered it all. There was even a few points where he jumped up onto the bed with me and pretty much laid on top of me to be sure he got me all stretched out (and yes I mean right on top. My leg stretched over my head and his face centimeters from mine.). Once he seemed to be happy with the painful and awkward situation he had just put me through he told me he was going to help me up. M said it would be very hard to get up on my own for the first time, but being the stubborn person I was I jolted up quickly. This only led to me falling straight onto his chest (which wasn’t that bad actually because oh man was he toned!). I felt like a baby horse trying to stand for the first time in years. It was as if he stretched my muscles out so much they did not know what to do anymore. But after a little stable support from my male model therapist I could stand on my own again.

After he had got me standing he decided to put me through one last final stroke of pain before I left, acupuncture and cupping. First he started with the acupuncture. He inserted four large needles into my thigh and then connected a battery to them to send an electrical shock into the muscle to help it relax. When the battery was turned up to enough voltage I was able to watch my muscle jerk and jolt continually as it was being stimulated. This treatment was not painful at all, in fact it was quite relaxing after the acrobatics I just had to perform with M on top of me. After this went on for about ten minutes the needles were removed and cups were put in their place. The cups were used to pull the muscle vertically to counteract all of the horizontal pulling we had done that session.

After the cups were removed I was free to go. I was bruised, beat up, and feeling like a colt walking out of there, but I felt better than I did walking in. I paid my $80 to the front desk, booked another torture session for the next week (as I will have to go weekly to keep making more progress), and made my way out to my vehicle. This time though, I decided to take the elevator because have you ever seen a new born colt walk down stairs? Believe me, it’s not a site you would want to see.